i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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