He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
