she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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