so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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