Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
