I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize
