just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize