Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
how drunk are you?
Several
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
