Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
