I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
