dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just cropdusted the office
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
