is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
