since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I believe in your delicious
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
