I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
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