Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
