you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize