so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
