Hey man sorry I got all grabby
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
