who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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