i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
