and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
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