you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
