What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
