halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
