bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
