if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
