but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
