His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
