How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize