is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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