Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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