sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
