dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
