I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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