I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Randomize
