I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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