I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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