they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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