If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
