pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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