My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I wish I only lived at night.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
