Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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