You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
