Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
