i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
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