thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
