at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
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