I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I touched a dick in church today
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
