If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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