That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I stole a fireplace last night.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
